Porn Addiction Ruins Intimate Relationships

July 25, 2022

Intimacy is a physical and emotional closeness between you and your significant other. You feel supported through the intimate connection you have with him. Intimate relationships provide a safe place to be vulnerable. A place where you can share your thoughts and feelings without concern. You are also comfortable sharing physical intimacy. 

True intimacy allows a deeper connection with your significant other. Your relationship feels strong and safe. The relationship feels secure and you have confidence that it can survive challenging times. Having an intimate relationship impacts you and the relationship in positive ways.

Porn addiction hurts your intimate relationship

    In healthy relationships, facing challenges together deepens intimacy and allows the couple to grow together. Secret porn use doesn’t allow this to happen. The addict uses porn to cope with feeling stressed or other negative emotions instead of reaching for the support of his wife. The porn holds him back from personal growth and holds him back from building an intimate relationship with you. After discovery, you might have pulled away from life, self-care and personal growth. Instead you focused on trying to compete with the porn, meet your husband’s needs, and fix his porn addiction. 

    In intimate relationships, open communication and a commitment to each other are key. When porn addiction is present in the relationship, it has a negative impact on both of these things. Open and honest communication doesn’t exist because the addict lies and keeps secrets to hide his addiction. His behavior also makes it very clear that he is more committed to porn than he is to the relationship. 

    Intimate relationships are built on trust. You can only be vulnerable with your thoughts, your feelings, and your body when you trust the other person. When a porn addiction is discovered, trust begins to fade away. When you discover specific details about the addiction and acting out, trust evaporates. Intimacy is lost. 

    You aren’t able to have the connection and closeness that truly intimate relationships have. Your commitment to each other and to the success of the relationship becomes weak. That quality of the relationship decreases.

    If you are in this situation, the best thing you can do is detach emotionally and take care of yourself. Intimacy wasn’t the only thing affected. Your personal wellbeing was affected too. Take time to focus on you. Rebuild your emotional security and your self-esteem. Trust yourself. If you’ve lost trust in yourself, rebuild it. Once you get yourself stable and feeling better, then you can decide what to do about the relationship. For now, the priority is you. 

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